Ken's Due Process Smokehouse BBQ Tee

Some careers are best managed from under indictment.

Others just take a few criminal charges, a scandalous FBI referral, and an impeachment to really find their footing.

Due Process Smokehouse has been low and slow since before Ken's legal team had him on speed dial — back when the brisket was already legendary and the only thing getting smoked was the oak wood. While Ken was busy allegedly doing favors for campaign donors and fleeing process servers during a pandemic, we were managing our fire the Texas way — low temperature, slow time, zero shortcuts — and letting the smoke do what the smoke does. This shirt celebrates the pit that outlasted every motion to dismiss, every continuance, and every suspiciously timed attorney general press conference. Est. Before Indictment #1 is what championship BBQ and Ken's legal calendar have in common: Low & Slow.

We printed this piece of Texas legal-BBQ folklore on a Comfort Colors heavyweight tee, offering a soft, broken-in feel that usually takes about as long to achieve as getting the Lt. Gov. into a courtroom. It's garment-dyed for a vintage look that holds its color better than Ken holds a consistent legal defense strategy. Features both front and back print.

Fabrication: 6.1 oz., 100% ring-spun cotton with double-needle stitching and a classic relaxed fit.

Perfect for the pitmaster who knows that real Texas BBQ — unlike Ken's legal strategy — never takes shortcuts. You just trust the process. Low and slow. Every time.

Add to cart — before the next continuance gets filed.